There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
Randomize
