Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
