he wants to bone in the snuggie
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
Woke up backwards on a recliner
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
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