They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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