is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
it's like iHOP with fire
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
Randomize
