If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
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