how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
do herpes really smell.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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