You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
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