I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
Randomize
