I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
And then my night got REAL pukey
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
