my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
