This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Randomize
