Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
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