Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
i woke up with toilet paper straight tucked up in my underwear wearing a pizza sauce mustach. I dont think i got laid last night.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
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