If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
I want a musical about memes.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Randomize
