Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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