hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
try to milk me bitch
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
