We won't sleep together?
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
Randomize
