I changed my tire completely alone.. I could totally win survivor
Its my greatest physical accomplishment
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
Randomize
