Small penises have feelings too.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
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