you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
I just realized my hands still smell like your cock. Which is awesome, but I wonder if the clerk at the store appreciated it.
I feel bad. I'm the reason hand sanitizer exists.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
The adults are the big ones right?
Randomize
