hotel room ftw
I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
Randomize
