My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
Randomize
