They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
Randomize