I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
Randomize