Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
Randomize
