its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
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