weddingsv make me drug and hornr
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
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