we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
Randomize
