Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
Randomize
