I wanna bring you to show and tell
So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize
