so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Randomize
