when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Randomize