I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
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