my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
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