I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Randomize
