Screwed.edu
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
this is a preemptive text before you call me freaking out: i have your keys and your car is parked safely a block down from your apartment.
you are a goddess
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
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