I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Randomize
