Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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