Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
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