thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
Randomize
