I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
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