just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
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