No, you can still breathe under the balls.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
she peed on how many people?
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
Randomize
