Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
Randomize
