thus making me awesome and them whores
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
Randomize
