shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
I forgot wine drunk hurts
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize
