So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
Actions speak louder than pants.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
Randomize