you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
