so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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