I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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