HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
Randomize
