How'd it feel making her break her religion?
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
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